Forget the destruction of local economies, oppressive work environments, poor land use policies, the systematic inequalities in promotion for women and minorities, the real reason not to shop big box stores is that you always seem to see the one person you don’t want to see.
After today’s pumpkin patch visit with my four year old daughter, Bug’s pre-k class, I headed to the local Costco to develop pictures for her teacher and the class. (Thank you, University, for the expensive digital camera for my err…research.) Instead of unloading the pictures and leaving, I hung around to look at all of the things I don’t need but might want and in bulk at that. I scored a couple of new books including Cornel West’s Democracy Matters and had a bad but very cheap lunch. Then my mindless afternoon hour of waiting went bad.
As I was strolling over to the photo section, I saw Miss Melanie (think Gone with the Wind), the mommy of one of Bug’s friends. Her face dropped as she looked at my belly. While my belly is far from flat, it is not the shape that she expected to see. I last saw her fourteen weeks ago, at the summer party I threw for Bug and her preschool friends.
Bug’s childhood is far different from mine. My childhood was spent lonely and scared that social services would snatch me away. Bug in contrast is our joyful center. We struggle to give her meaningful experiences and to fill in where the extended family should be. Thus the summer party—replete with elaborate decorations, a meal for parents and children alike, and a huge mess for later. Miss Melanie worried through the whole affair. She was worried that I was doing too much; that there was too much to clean up; that I was too exhausted, etc. Three weeks later my cervix opened and our world fell apart.
Miss Melanie saw me before I saw her. I felt the pressure of her stare and turned to look to see who was mad dogging me. Her face turned to a mask of sorrow that quickly gave way to tears—all of this in the middle of Costco. I stood there comforting her, thinking that next time I am going to the local mom and pop photobooth.
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